Nurturing Yourself as a New Mom: Compassionate Steps to Follow
Motherhood is a profound and transformative journey. Becoming a new mom for most is filled with new experiences that reshape your daily life and sense of identity. Being in this unfamiliar territory can bring on anxiety and feelings of being overwhelmed.
In the whirlwind of constant caregiving, it is easy to lose sight of yourself. So many mothers I work with, providing online therapy sessions across New York and Connecticut, share the same struggle with the belief that they should not prioritize themselves. If you’re feeling stretched thin, emotionally depleted, or unsure how to take care of your own needs without feeling guilty, you're not alone.
This blog shares gentle and compassionate strategies to support your mental health as a new mom. Nurturing yourself is not selfish, it is a vital part of sustaining your emotional health and well-being.
1. Start by Giving Yourself Permission
The very first step in prioritizing yourself is giving yourself permission to do so. This can feel surprisingly difficult. Many mothers carry internalized messages like “It’s wrong to take time for myself” or “Other moms seem to handle more, why can’t I?”
But here's the truth: you can care for your child and care for yourself at the same time. Taking even a few minutes each day to rest, breathe, or connect with yourself supports your capacity to show up with more presence and resilience.
Therapy can help you unpack the guilt that comes with self-care and begin replacing it with self-compassion. Because you deserve care too!
2. Practice Small Acts of Self-Care
Self-care doesn't need to be a spa day. You do not have to have a ton of time either. It can be small, repeatable acts that ground you and help you reconnect with yourself. Here are some examples:
Drinking a cold glass of water
Stepping outside for a couple of minutes of fresh air or going for a short walk
Listening to music that soothes or uplifts you
Texting a friend just to say hello
Taking five deep breaths
These moments may seem simple, but they are powerful reminders that attending to you and your needs matter. Further exploration most often needs to occur to find additional ways that are more long lasting and sustainable but these simple examples are an effective and beneficial first steps. Taking time to restore your mental, emotional, and physical well-being allows you to be more present, patient, and grounded in your role as a mother.
3. Reconnect with Your Inner Voice
The transition into motherhood can be disorienting. You may not feel like the person you used to be, and that is okay, part of this journey is discovering who you are now.
We can work together in therapy to explore your values, needs, and evolving identity, helping you find clarity and confidence in who you are becoming. It’s not about getting back to the “old you,” but about honoring your full self, including the parts that are still growing.
4. Create Boundaries That Protect Your Energy
Boundaries are essential to your well-being, especially as a new mom. Boundaries allow you to protect your time, energy, and mental health, particularly in this period of time that’s often emotionally and physically demanding. This could mean:
Saying “no” to visitors when you’re too tired
Asking for help with your baby so you can nap or asking for help around the house so you can focus on caring for your baby
Letting go of pressure to respond to every message or check every to-do on your list
In therapy, I can help you identify where you're feeling drained and teach you how to begin to establish healthy personal boundaries whether that is with others or with yourself. Protecting your energy is an act of love for both you and your family.
5. Accept Help
You don’t need to carry it all alone. Whether you’re seeking help from a partner, family member, friend, or professional, reaching out is a strength, not a weakness.
You can start by sharing one small thing you’re struggling with or expressing how you’ve been feeling lately. You don’t have to have the perfect words, their is so much benefit in letting the people you trust know that you could use some support, even if you're not sure what that looks like yet.
If you're experiencing symptoms of postpartum anxiety, depression, or simply feeling like you're not yourself, therapy can be a safe, nonjudgmental space to talk about it and begin to feel more like you again.
6. Learn How to Be Kind to Yourself
New moms are often their own harshest critics. You may catch yourself thinking, "I’m not doing enough” or “I should be happier.” These thoughts are often rooted in perfectionism and unrealistic expectations.
One powerful part of therapy is learning how to cultivate a more compassionate inner voice. I can help you recognize when these thoughts arise and gently guide you in practicing self-kindness.
You Don’t Have to Do This Alone
Whether you're feeling overwhelmed by postpartum anxiety, navigating the emotional rollercoaster of early motherhood, or struggling to care for yourself in the midst of caring for others, please know you do not need to figure it out by yourself.
I offer Telehealth therapy sessions to women throughout New York and Connecticut, so you can receive support from the comfort and privacy of your own home. Therapy is a safe space where your fears are heard without judgment and where you are honored and nurtured. Together, we’ll work to help you gently reconnect with yourself amidst the demands of motherhood, begin prioritizing your emotional needs, and build a supportive foundation for your well-being, one step at a time.
Let’s Begin with One Compassionate Step Toward You
If this speaks to you, I invite you to schedule a free phone consultation. Therapy offers a supportive space to slow down, take a breath, reflect on what you’re carrying, and begin to feel more grounded and empowered.
How to Identify Anxiety Symptoms: 5 Lesser Spoken About Signs
Insights from a Telehealth Therapist Serving Connecticut and New York
When people think of anxiety, they often picture the more visible signs: racing thoughts and constant worry. But for many women, anxiety doesn’t always announce itself so clearly. It can present in more subtle and often unexpected ways, disguised as tiredness, irritability, or the simple desire to avoid that unread email.
In my work as a licensed clinical social worker providing virtual therapy to women in Connecticut and New York, I’ve seen how often anxiety gets overlooked or can be misunderstood. When symptoms don’t fit the typical mold, it’s easy to brush them off or think, “Maybe I’m just being lazy.”
But the truth is: anxiety can show up in many different ways. And recognizing and naming the less obvious signs can be the first powerful step toward healing.
The More Common Anxiety Symptoms
Let’s briefly start with the symptoms that most people recognize as anxiety. These signs are valid, real, and often talked about:
Nervousness: A general feeling of unease, like something is “off” or could go wrong.
Worry: Frequent and persistent thoughts that are often about the future or worst-case scenarios.
Increased heart rate: A pounding heart, even when nothing is “wrong.”
Rapid breathing: Feeling short of breath or like you can’t catch your breath.
Sweating or trembling: Physical signs of being on high alert.
While these symptoms are important to recognize, anxiety is individualized, it doesn’t always show up the same way in everyone, especially in women. That’s why it’s just as important to talk about the lesser known signs.
5 Lesser Spoken About Symptoms of Anxiety
1. Fatigue That Doesn’t Make Sense
Do you ever wake up feeling like you didn’t rest at all, even after a full night’s sleep? Or find yourself constantly drained, even when you haven’t done anything physically strenuous?
This is often anxiety. When you’re anxious, your brain and body are on high alert. Even if you’re not consciously aware of it, your nervous system may be constantly scanning for danger, replaying conversations, or preparing for imagined scenarios, which takes a toll.
2. Muscle Tension and Physical Discomfort
Have you ever realized you’ve been clenching your jaw all day? Or noticed your shoulders are up near your ears without knowing how they got there?
Anxiety is just as physical as it is emotional. When your body is in a constant state of “fight, flight, or freeze,” it often responds with muscle tension and discomfort. These symptoms are signs your body is staying in a guarded or defensive state, even if you don’t recognize feeling actively stressed.
Common signs include:
Jaw pain or clenching
Tightness in the shoulders and neck
Headaches
Back pain or stomachaches
3. Irritability and Short Temper
Irritability is one of the most misunderstood symptoms of anxiety, especially in women. But irritability can be a signal from your nervous system. When your inner resources are stretched thin, your brain may interpret even small inconveniences as big threats. You might find yourself snapping at loved ones, feeling overstimulated by sounds, or getting frustrated easily.
4. Difficulty Concentrating or Making Decisions
Anxiety can interfere with how clearly and confidently you think. You might:
Zone out during conversations
Struggle to finish tasks you normally breeze through
Go back and forth on simple decisions (like what to eat or wear)
This mental cloudiness is frustrating and frequently mistaken for a lack of motivation or productivity when in reality, it’s often your mind trying to manage becoming overwhelmed and feelings of uncertainty.
5. Avoidance and Procrastination
This one can be subtle in presentation but is incredibly common.
You might avoid checking your email, putting off errands, or skipping conversations that feel uncomfortable. On the surface, it can look like procrastination or poor time management but under the surface, it’s often anxiety saying: “This feels too hard or too risky right now.”
Avoidance is a protective strategy, it gives short-term relief but often leads to long-term stress.
The Hidden Gift of Anxiety (Yes, Really)
Anxiety is often labeled as “bad,” but it actually plays a meaningful role. It’s your body’s way of trying to protect you, it alerts you when something feels off or unsafe, it can reveal what we deeply value, and in some cases, it can even motivate growth and change.
When managed well, anxiety can be:
A motivator to prepare and plan
A protector when you truly need to be alert
An insightful guide into your values and boundaries
The key is not to eliminate anxiety completely but to learn how to better understand and manage it.
Therapy Addressing Anxiety in Connecticut and New York
You don’t need to wait until anxiety becomes unbearable to seek help. The good news is that you don’t have to figure it out on your own. Understanding your symptoms is empowering. It’s the first step in learning how to manage anxiety in a way that supports your well-being.
In my virtual therapy practice, I help women across Connecticut and New York recognize and work through anxiety with compassion, support, and practical coping skills tailored to their individual needs. Telehealth offers flexibility, privacy, and convenience to help you prioritize your mental health.
Taking the Next Step
If any of the discussed symptoms resonate with you, please know you’re not alone. Anxiety can look a little different for everyone; however, healing starts with being seen and supported.
I invite you to schedule a free consultation call to explore how therapy can help you feel more grounded and empowered.
Let’s talk about what you're experiencing and how I can support you through it, one step at a time.
This blog post is for informational purposes only and is not intended as clinical advice. If you are experiencing anxiety or mental health challenges, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional for a full evaluation.